dysprosooc | TEST DRIVE ; no. 1

TEST DRIVE MEME

So first of all, welcome to Dyspros' very first test drive meme! We're happy that you're interested in the game, and we hope that you have some fun playing with the setting, regardless of whether you decide to join or not.

As a general reminder, we recommend that you look over the game information before jumping in. In addition, if you decide you're ready to join, you're welcome to put in a reserve, and applications will open on May 4th at 12:01 AM (EST). Finally, if you have any questions or concerns, please send us a message!

So now, without further ado, let's get to playing:

A ; NEW RECRUIT
Well then, welcome to the guild, Initiate! After some thought (or maybe the choice was obvious), you've finally settled on a guild, and you're ready to get started. You're welcome to check out your accommodations and see what kind of people you'll be living with for the foreseeable future. This is your home now, so hopefully you get alone with them. If not, then you can just spend all of your time sharpening your skills!

Whether you're just claiming your bed or you're jumping right into the thick of things to practice or sign up for a mission, a new recruit is unlikely to go unnoticed.
B ; MISSION TIME
It's your first mission, which is pretty exciting, right? You have all these pictures in your head of going off to fight a dragon, to come home with great riches and valor...

Too bad those missions are for the higher ups.

No, it's the middle of the night, and you're out guarding the small fields just outside of town from wild animals. Right now you're standing by the cucumbers, which are considered especially important to guard, for some reason. You have to fight off sleepiness somehow, so maybe an animal will come out for you to scare off, or maybe you'll just end up chatting with whoever is stuck doing this with you.

Or you know, if you're a dick, you'll steal the vegetables for yourself.
C ; STORM THE CASTLE
Okay, the missions for initiates are pretty lame, and you're ready for some real fighting. You can go alone, or you can go with some other people, but it's off to Castle Dyspros! You'll find a variety of creatures to fight, and the power of teamwork will help you make progress through the castle!

Or you'll die. There's that too. Good thing it's fairly inconsequential, if weird!

Either way, have fun fighting to your heart's content!
D ; PICK YOUR OWN
Just like it says, if none of the others appeal to you, feel free to make up your own prompt!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ D ]

[ You wanna hunt some monsters? Great. Thanks to his extensive study of the Academics Guild's bestiaries, Akari's been instructed to accompany you as a walking, talking guide to the many dangers that may befall you. Or to be some kind of combat medic, even if he lacks the class skills for it right now.

Fortunately, it seems you've stumbled on a nest of small fluffy creatures whose large, adorable eyes are their only defense against predators. And they seem intent on scurrying up your leg, perching on your shoulder, and chewing on your hair. Both of you. Covered in cute things.

They trill, unreasonably pleased with how delicious this stringy stuff is. They are going to kill you with kindness. ]

[ Akari-sensei accompanying him for training? Th-this should be fine, right? It's not like this was a check-up! He could do this, Yogi could do this...

... that was if he could prevent his legs from shaking.

The blond glanced towards his back occasionally with the constant reminder that the doctor was close behind. Though with an uncertain smile the boy presses forward until the small huddle of little animals were discovered.

THEY LOOK SO HAPPY TO SEE YOU, AKARI. ]

Uwah, Akari-sensei! Look at these! Aren't they so cute? [ With a coo of delight, Yogi allows the animals to crawl up his leg and onto his neck, laughing all the while. ]

That... that tickles! Aha!

[ Being assigned to Yogi is certainly preferable to being paired with Hirato, both in the interest of monitoring his condition and having the upper hand for once, but that much exuberance can take its toll on a man's sanity. This is the fun police. Come out with your hands up. ]

Maybe to the untrained eye. [ Akari moves closer, reaching for one of the little fluffballs, feigning obliviousness to any potential effects of his proximity (or his words, for that matter). ] You weren't sent here to be careless, and I haven't been given access to proper medical supplies.

[ He picks one up off his own shoulder and sets it down. ]

According to the guild's books, they have the ability to feed on one's positive emotions. As we've seen proof of this world's magic, it's unlikely such records are false.

~~[ ...through their hair?? this sounds like some D&D logic but hey it's 5 am and why did i decide to invent random magical creatures anyway ]~~

[ hell yeah does he want to hunt some fucking monsters!! it's been too long since hirato last got to stab something really hard, and it's been a very strange period of time indeed, this whole being seen as a dumb loser bookworm rookie. time for some motherfucking danger, yeah!!

except he kind of has to babysit akari-san... darn it... oh, well. at least he's sure to get some fun out of this, considering the company.

and now they're both covered in super cute little fuzzy creatures that really seem to like hair and which i won't describe in further detail because this tag is overdue and i want to get it out okay. imagine a really poetic passage about fur and adorable bright eyes here. ]

So, is this where you inform me that these creatures are actually flesh-eating and that they're simply warming up, Akari-san?

[ wow wtf this tickles ]

[ Who's the babysitter? All of these combat-oriented guilds are so concerned with fighting monsters that they'll damage the ecosystem if they aren't careful. These things aren't Valga to be destroyed on sight. They're animals who've been carefully documented in the name of knowledge and protecting any wayward idiots who might blunder into their fluffy little lairs.

He tries in vain to shoo one away but it's just so clingy... ]

You would be adept at identifying a two-faced creature. [ Akari gestures to Hirato's equipment -- he probably has something appropriate on him, even if it's just his glasses. ] Aim that over here and look at its reflection.

[ And the fluffy creature's reflection will reveal something a little more sinister, scaled like a little baby dragon ~~and also probably still adorable~~. He doesn't completely believe the magical explanation and would prefer to find a scientific one, but facts are facts. It's clearly not what it seems. ]

Despite the illusion, it's quite harmless in the adolescent stage.

[ where akari's trying to shoo these little balls of fluff away, hirato's taking this sudden cuddle attack in stride. if only because it seems like getting rid of them is a futile effort. ]

All part of the job. [ he'll ignore that jab for now, thank you very much. ] Very well.

[ welp, he'll just use his sword (he totally polishes it well even if he doesn't really think of it as his okay) for this mirror business... and lo and behold, there's a completely different tiny creature reflected in it. still cute, though-- their fur feels so real and somehow that's the most curious part of this.

Harmless in the adolescent stage. this certainly is no beast worthy of slaying, scales and all that aside. while hirato is still rather skeptical of these magical explanations he seems to keep running into (and he would like to dismiss them as simple fairy tales), he also has to admit that this isn't the world he knows. this is a different place altogether, with different laws regarding what is and isn't possible, and to reject the proof presented to him would be idiotic. ]

It seems you've been studying hard.

[ so does this mean he can't stab these little shits... :( ]

TEST DRIVE ; no. 1

Akari | Karneval | slamming down this abysmally-late placeholder before bed

Oh hello there u///u

slowpoke says it's very nice to meet you .///.

this is clearly the best tag i have ever written

it really truly absolutely is

i have a star.... me.... star.... have.... pbbbbttttt....